At some point in our life, we are going to feel left out, left behind, or lonely. It is an inevitable part of being a human being and of human nature. We are inherently social creatures for the most part. Of course, it fluctuates throughout our lives in stages, as if it is a pendulum swinging back and forth. And some people naturally seem to need more social contact than others. But that normalcy is not what the author addresses in this book. Instead, she delves into the deep end of the pool when life hits us with a hammer blow and we find ourselves rejected, left out or even turned out deliberately. How do we survive such a blow?
The author tells some of her own story. She’s done research on rejection in humans and found two core fears that feed a person’s sensitivity to rejection: the fear of being abandoned and the fear of losing one’s identity. Her story confirms that she understands these fears well. She had once been abandoned, and with her father went her identity. She knows how it feels to lose in this deliberate way and writes from this knowledge one of the most powerful books I have ever read. Her core beliefs led her to feel unwanted, even by God. How do you overcome that?
For me this book was so powerful that I would read sections of it over and over to get all I could out of it. I couldn’t just sit down and read the book as a fiction novel. I had to read it piece by piece and leave plenty of time between the reading to contemplate what I learned. I’m also a book underliner. When I find something especially meaningful to me, I underline or highlight or circle or bracket it in some way to bring my attention back to that part. Judging from those markings in my copy of the book, the entire volume spoke to me in a very personal way. Every few pages were marked in some way. Lysa TerKeurst’s words touched me. They confirmed that I was not alone in this struggle. They affirmed that someone else had floundered around feeling lost on the inside while trying to look normal on the outside.
Several months ago I happened to read about this book on a Bible Study website. I knew immediately that this book would be able to help get me out of the funk I had fallen into. So I ordered the Bible Study material to go along with the book and the online group sessions. For me, the most valuable resource was the book itself. The study material was nice, and the online videos were uplifting, but it was the book that I needed the most. It helped pave the way for my inner healing.
My opinion is that Lysa TerKeurst’s book is an effective tool that God can use to bring healing to the parts of us that have been ripped apart and torn to shreds by people and circumstances determined to stomp us into the ground. What she writes is much more than an affirming pat on the head and empty promises of a kinder future. We don’t need that. There are already plenty of books that do that. The author goes way beyond mere platitudes and gets down to our core beliefs and builds on them. She clarifies them and helps us understand them so they can provide a stable foundation where God teaches us to do life in spite of setbacks and heartbreak. This book has my enthusiastic endorsement. Get the book and share it. You’ll never regret that decision.